On My Mind...

This song by Evanescence haunts me. Every time I hear it I cry. Just thought I would share...

My Immortal

I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the (in)sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me, I've been alone all along

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me, me, me

Time For A Break

Life, at this point, is just hard. The holidays are upon us. One of my children is struggling in a way that is too big for this mother to fix. I am barely keeping my head above water. Thankfully, I have friends, family and professionals that are helping me, and helping my beautiful child.

I will be away for a while. I'm not sure how long. I will still try to visit my blog friends when I have the opportunity.

I hope all of you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. I would appreciate any and all prayers that you could send our way.

Halloween '09

I know it is almost the middle of November, but I've been busy. Really busy. The girls wanted me to write a little about our Halloween, so I thought, better late than never, right?

I am not a fan of Halloween. My kids LOVE Halloween. So, down came my Fall decorations and up went the creepy Halloween decorations. (That guy on the door had a motion sensor in him and anytime someone knocked on the door, or the wind blew, he would scream and moan and terrify me.)

The girls used to love to watch scary movies with their Daddy. I was never one to want to join them. Scary movies creep me out. I don't like them. I thought they were terrible for the kids. But, it was a special thing they did with just him and that made it okay with me. They have some great memories of those times.

And of course, we had to have a party. I promised the kids a party this year and I always keep my promises. We had a blast. (I was the Mad Hatter, not a leprechaun.) In attendance was an Angel, a Devil, a couple of cats, a pilot, a cowgirl, Beyonce' and a really pretty Viking. Tacey came as herself - she just refused to wear a costume.

And I had to get a photo of my beautiful children by themselves. Jamie was (obviously) a French maid, Whitney was Princess Buttercup, Summer was a fairy, and Clarke was the gigantic ghost in the background. It was hysterically funny watching a 6'5" ghost dancing. He entertained us all night long with that.

I might have started yet another tradition and I'm okay with that, even if it is for Halloween.

Early Winter?

As you can see from my thermometer above, the outside temperature on Monday morning at 9:32 a.m. was 39 degrees (it was 65 degrees inside my house!). This is October in Atlanta, y'all! It shouldn't be this cold!

Below is what my front yard looked like on that same morning. I couldn't believe it. I don't remember ever turning my heat on this early, but I definitely had to this year. The thermostat in my bedroom read 56 degrees when I woke up Monday morning. That is just too cold, even for me!

(Yes, there is a hand in that planter - it's a piece of our Halloween decor.)

I'm not sure what the rest of Fall will be like for us. After our chilly start to the week, by Wednesday it was getting close to 80 degrees! We have had, over the course of the last month, 14 inches of rain where I live. Thankfully, we had no flooding. But 14 inches??!!! That is SO MUCH RAIN. We are having some crazy weather around here. How's the weather in your neck of the woods?

A Taste of Fall

I thought I would share a little of my Fall decor. I didn't really buy anything new this year. I just added to stuff I already had and rearranged a few things. I have had my door wreath for several years now. I started with a plain grapevine wreath and just stuck/glued/wired stuff on. Each Fall I add or subtract things to make it look the way I want. I love the tiny little scarecrows I put in there this year. I need something pretty bold on the door in order to compete with the ivy! (I trimmed the ivy this weekend, after this picture was made. With all the rain we had, the ivy was literally growing into the house. It made getting in and out of the door slightly difficult.)


Next is the mantle. I added the star this year. It stays up all the time. I had a picture there that I've probably had for 25 years or more and it has been in all of my homes. I still love it, but wanted a change.

A little garden flag that is in my front yard.

I always wanted a square wreath. I found this one on clearance a couple of years ago and it now hangs on my dining room wall.

Beautiful mums. I have to have a couple of pots each year. I have tried planting them after they flower and sometimes they come back up the following year and sometimes they don't.

Here is the flag by my garage. It's by Mary Englebreit and I just adore that little child's face. I used to love to jump in the leaves when I was a little girl.

We are finally feeling Fall temperatures around here. I have had my air conditioning turned off and all of the windows open for about a week now. It is so wonderful to sleep with the windows open at night and actually need a couple of blankets! I am hoping that we're done with the blazing temperatures we had all summer long. Here's to a wonderful Fall!

Happy 11th Birthday Summer!

Summer with Bandit (my neighbor's dog) and Tacey.

Happy, happy birthday to my Summer. My baby. My littlest one. I cannot believe that she is eleven years old. The time has literally flown by. She is always helpful. She is so funny. She acts like a little old lady sometimes. Her favorite show is The Golden Girls. She is quirky. She is smart. We all call her "Grandmother". Whitney, who is 23 years old, told me that if something ever happened to me, she would want Summer to be her mother.

Summer wearing one of Whitney's prom dresses.

She didn't want a cake. She didn't want balloons. She didn't want a party. She barely asked for any gifts. That is just her nature. She is a giver. She always has been.

Summer and Tacey snuggling? Posing? Sort of sleeping?

We had a party for her over the weekend anyway. Whitney, Clarke and Brittony came home on Friday night and stayed for the weekend. We ate, then ate some more. We played cards. The kids played Guitar Hero. Everyone took walks in the relatively dry night air. And, we put candles in a (still somewhat frozen) Lemon Meringue Pie and sang to her. Then Erin came over on Saturday. Clarke took Summer birthday shopping. Whitney stayed yet another night. I think Summer liked it. In fact, I believe she was quite pleased that I ignored her requests for no birthday celebration. I sure do love my sweet Summer and I hope she has the best year ever.

Whitney, Jamie, Clarke, me & Summer on our front steps.

Steak = Love

This past weekend Whitney came home for a visit. Of course, it was raining. And of course, we were hungry. I had been craving steak. Not just any steak, but this steak. I have to tell you, it did not disappoint. It was worth every single second of standing in the rain in front of my grill.

Grilled Ribeye Steak with Onion-Blue Cheese Sauce

2 ribeye steaks (I used t-bones)
2 tablespoons butter
Salt
Pepper
4 tablespoons butter
1 very large yellow onion (I used 1 1/2 - we love onions)
3/4 to 1 cup heavy cream (I used 1 cup)
1/2 cup crumbled blue cheese (heaping 1/2 cup... yummmm)

Salt and pepper both sides of the steaks. Grill (in grill pan) in 2 tablespoons butter until medium rare. (I put mine on the outside gas grill.)

Saute onions in 4 tablespoons butter over high heat. Cook for 5 to 7 minutes, or until dark and caramelized. Reduce heat to simmer and pour in cream. Cook for 3 to 5 minutes, or until reduced by half. Stir in blue cheese until melted. Serve steaks on generous portion of sauce.

If you have never visited the Pioneer Woman's blog, you need to. Her recipes are all so very delicious. She gives you step-by-step instructions. She is an awesome cook AND she is funny.

Here are a few pictures from our delicious meal:

Putting lots of freshly ground pepper on.

Mucho onions!

The heavy cream mixed in with the caramelized onions. Can you smell it?

Yes, I said a HEAPING 1/2 cup of bleu cheese.

Whitney watching over the sauce.

Grillin' in the rain.

Perfectly cooked steak on a bed of saucy goodness.

Tacey wanted some, too.

(Look at Summer's mouth, she had finished her steak and was "helping" Whitney. Tee, hee!)